Sopir Taksi Baru

dapet email dari evi,...luthuuuu :

Kejadian ini terjadi hari Senin lalu, sebut saja namanya, Susi. Karena ada
kerjaan yang tidak bisa ditinggal, Susi harus bekerja sampai larut malam
dikantornya. Ketika ingin pulang Susi menyetop taksi untuk mengantarnya
pulang.

"Kebon Jeruk ya Pak"

Sopir taksi itu hanya menggangguk, selama perjalanan tidak terjadi
percakapan antara Susi dan Sopir Taksi, mungkin Susi merasa capek karena
bekerja sampai larut malam. 20 menit lamanya keheningan terjadi, tiba-tiba
Susi ingat bahwa uang yang dibawanya kurang untuk membayar ongkos taksi.
Susi lalu menepuk pundak Sopir taksi dengan maksud berhenti dulu didepan
untuk mengambil uang di ATM.

Tapi tiba2 setelah pundaknya ditepuk oleh Susi, Sopir taksi itu secara
membabi buta membanting setirnya ke kanan kemudian ke kiri sambil berteriak
secara histeris, sampai akhirnya taksi itu menabrak sebuah pohon.

Untung Susi dan Sopir Taksinya tidak mengalami luka yang cukup parah. Sopir
Taksi itu kemudian meminta maaf kepada Susi
"Maaf ya Bu, Ibu nggak apa-apa? Ibu sih make nepuk pundak saya, kagetnya
setengah mati bu!!"
"Lho, masa sih ditepuk pundaknya aja kaget??"
"Soalnya ini hari pertama saya jadi sopir Taksi, Bu"
"Emangnya pekerjaan bapak sebelumnya apa??"
"Selama 20 tahun saya jadi SOPIR MOBIL JENAZAH..."

Singapore Acronyms

Beberapa waktu lalu dapet email dari temen,...isina cuman jokes ajah,....luthuuu
tapi buwat nyang gak tinggal di singapur mungkin gak gitu mudeng kali ye,....
silahken tanya yahhhh

In Singapore, the majority of us live in Highly Dangerous Buildings
(HDB), and most people have already got used to Paying And Paying
(PAP). Not only do you have to pay, you Pay Until Bankrupt (PUB). If
that's not enough, somebody still Purposely Wants to Dig (PWD) and
get more from you.

So what more can you do when you are in the Money Only Environment
(MOE)? With the current Mad Accounting System (MAS), you are forced
to Pay the Sum Ahead (PSA), which will leave some people Permanently
Owing Some Banks (POSB) and forced to live on the Loan Techniques
Always (LTA) system.

When you fall sick and happen to be admitted to a Money Operating
Hospital (MOH), you might be able to use your Cash Prior to Funeral
(CPF) fund. If you are out of luck, you may meet doctors who Never
Use Heart (NUH) to treat you, and you will be Sure to Give up Hope
(SGH).

To help ease the traffic, motorists have to pay Cash On Expressway
(COE). If that doesn't help, they can always Eternally Raise Prices
(ERP) on the roads. If you don't own a car, you can always make a Mad
Rush to the Train (MRT), or get squashed in a bus Side By Side (SBS).

Lastly, under all these pressures, there are not many places we can
relax, not even the good old place we used to go because it has
become So Expensive and Nothing To See Actually (SENTOSA)!!!

Matematika

Dapet e-mail dari temen :

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Here's a little mathematical formula that might help you answer these questions:
If:
A B C D E F G H I J K L M N O P Q R S T U V W X Y Z
Is represented as:
1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 16 17 18 19 20 21 22 23 24 25 26

Then:
H-A-R-D-W-O-R-K
8+1+18+4+23+15+18+11 = 98%

and,
K-N-O-W-L-E-D-G-E
11+14+15+23+12+5+4+7+5 = 96%

but,
A-T-T-I-T-U-D-E
1+20+20+9+20+21+4+5 = 100%

And,
B-U-L-L-S-H-I-T
2+21+12+12+19+8+9+20 = 103%

And look how far ass kissing will take you:
A-S-S-K-I-S-S-I-N-G
1+19+19+11+9+19+19+9+14+7 = 118%

So, one can conclude with mathematical certainity that:
While Hardwork and Knowledge will get you close, and Attitude will get you there, Bullshit and Ass Kissing will put you over the top!!!
a ton of people who practice this and get places in this world!
---------------------------------

Ckakakakak, bebek baru ngeh deh,....kenapa dulu si A bisa jadi Manager,...si B jadi superpisor,....

Joke of The Day

A story from the Japanese Embassy in US

Prime Minister Mori was given some basic English conversation training before he visits Washington and meets with President Bill Clinton. The instructor told Mori : " Prime Minister, when you shake hand with President Clinton, please say 'how are you'.
Then Mr Clinton should say "I am fine, and you ?" Now you should say 'me too'. Afterwards we translators will do all the work for you."
It looks quite simple, but the truth is ... When Mori met Clinton, he mistakenly said : "Who Are You ?". Mr Clinton was a bit shocked but still managed to react with humor : "Well, I am Hilary's husband, ha ha..." Then Mori replied confidently "Me too, ha ha ha.." Then there was a long silent moment in the meeting room.
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One Chinese person walks into a bar in America late one night
and he saw Steven Spielberg. As he was a great fan of his movies, he rushes over to him, and asks for his autograph. Instead, Spielberg gives him a slap and says "You Chinese people bombed our Pearl Harbor, get out of here." The astonished Chinese man replied "It was not the Chinese who bombed your Pearl Harbor, it was the Japanese". "Chinese, Japanese,Taiwanese, you're all the same," replied Spielberg. In return, the Chinese gives Spielberg a slap and says "You sank the Titanic, my forefathers were on that ship." Shocked, Spielberg replies "It was the iceberg that sank the ship, not me." The Chinese replies, "Iceberg, Spielberg, Carlsberg, you're all the same."